Study: By Age 18 Average American Teenager Will Have Clicked “I Am Over 18” 2,426,736,230,481 Times

PHILADELPHIA – Researchers at the Ben Franklin Institute of Shit You Already Knew have been studying the frequency that youngsters access the readily available porn hidden behind an airtight honor […]

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Obama Executive Order: No Longer Can Gas Stations Post “With Car Wash” Prices

“Fine, hard working Americans with no desire to wash their car are being lured in by big promises of low prices. We can’t allow Washington’s toxic culture of gridlock and dysfunction to prevent moving forward with honest pricing. That’s why I signed this order into law effective immediately. Thank you and God bless America.”

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